December 2011
1 tag
Dec 31st
40,475 notes
Dec 31st
58,732 notes
Dec 31st
1,307 notes
friend: i got an A on my calculus test
friend: i got a hot boyfriend
friend: i had so much fun partying this weekend
me: one time i got four notes on a text post i made
Dec 31st
83,206 notes
Walks into chair
Me: Sorry
Chair:
Dec 31st
81,743 notes
Dec 31st
19,248 notes
Turns out the restaurant’s menu changes daily and of course that means there were no vegetarian options today so I had to eat two shrimp and two scallops to shut my family up and I hadn’t had seafood in like 6 months and now my stomach feels like it was just filled wit hydrochloric acid. Life.
Dec 31st
Dec 30th
11,141 notes
Dec 30th
8,571 notes
I wish my parents would consider the fact that I’m a vegetarian when they choose where to go out to dinner from time to time.  I wouldn’t mind it as much if I had a choice as to whether or not I wanted to go with them, but I don’t have that choice. And it sucks to check the menu of the restaurant they chose just to find out that all I can have is the spinach and artichoke dip...
Dec 30th
My dog has been growling at me for the past half an hour because I’m eating breakfast and I’ve only given her 5 fries and 3 ice cubes. I think I might have turned her into a spoiled brat. 
Dec 30th
Dec 30th
3,869 notes
2 tags
Dec 30th
70,927 notes
2 tags
Dec 30th
4,121 notes
1 tag
Dec 30th
9,342 notes
Dec 30th
6,064 notes
Dec 30th
90 notes
Dec 30th
154 notes
Dec 30th
32,661 notes
Dec 30th
730 notes
So I woke up at 5 this morning rather than 4 like I did yesterday. I guess that’s a slight improvement. I just want to sleep all the way through the night, just once, please.
Dec 30th
Dec 29th
20,846 notes
Dec 29th
1,019 notes
Dec 29th
40,968 notes
Dec 29th
482 notes
1 tag
Dec 29th
Dec 29th
29,052 notes
Dec 28th
2,711 notes
Dec 28th
13,783 notes
Dec 28th
19 notes
Dec 28th
11 notes
Dec 28th
29 notes
Dec 28th
49 notes
1 tag
Dec 28th
10 notes
5 o’clock in the morning. I’m sitting in my room eating Doritos and drinking vodka. My dad wakes up in like half and hour. I don’t know why I’m making this post, it just seems like a good idea right now. My typing is immaculate, this proves that I am a brilliant drunk texter. I read that back and I swore I typed duck instead of drunk for like 2 minutes. Cool. ...
Dec 28th
2 tags
Dec 28th
21,448 notes
Dec 28th
14,678 notes
Dec 28th
1,080 notes
1 tag
Dec 28th
3,484 notes
Dec 27th
53,577 notes
Dec 27th
254,910 notes
Dec 27th
32,533 notes
I just tried to walk to the kitchen despite my entire right leg being asleep. Never again.
Dec 27th
“I was sitting on the sofa in the second bedroom one afternoon, thinking and...”
– Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (via andiwouldntsaynotosomethingsweet)
Dec 27th
223 notes
Dec 27th
18,395 notes
Dec 27th
67,263 notes
Dec 27th
64,624 notes
1 tag
Biology Teacher: So the sperm is surrounded with glucose
student: you mean semen is like sugar?
Biology Teacher: yeah basically
me: doesn't taste like..
Biology Teacher:
me:
student:
Biology Teacher:
me:
student:
me: whoops
Dec 27th
118,408 notes
Dec 27th
4,149 notes
2 tags
Dec 27th
9,602 notes